Saturday, July 31, 2010

煩擾

同樣的事宜,整天在腦海裡出現再出現。同樣的事情再發生,機會率是百分百。想好了,如果真的出現,不用告訴我什麼,我只須寫一封信好了(覺得她是借刀殺人)。沒有得選擇,因為我根本不想做他的工作(如果要做早就做了)。

好,就這樣決定。

沒有吃過

想想,晚飯時沒有吃過檯上的兩碟肉。

吃了日本帶回來的桃,大大個,很甜,可不是我杯茶。

Chinese

Suddenly the button to change to typing in Chinese disappearred and don't know how to recover. Last night thought reboot PC then no issue. However, it is still missing.

下載了南極星,暫時把問題解決。

29 Jul 10

那按鈕回來了。做了什麼?刪除了一個程式。為何會想到這樣做,好簡單,按鈕不見了是因為那程式安裝了以後。

沒有去活動

有點累。

Friday, July 30, 2010

如何

朋友S 問我感覺如何,對新的任務。沒有,從來也沒有。工作,只是賺錢,做什麼沒有關係(低低能能的也能接受)。我介懷什麼,他不知道。

他要知道的是,現在的工作在消失中,是老闆要我留下才想出這個安排。去別的地方,一樣是未知數,想來做什麼。做事情,沒有人會擔心我,況且那些是我死她死,儘量做就是了。最麻煩的只是有個是下屬卻要當上司來對待的同事 (可能這是新派,我真的老了)。

她要找我麻煩,知道背後的原因。事情要怎樣,對我來說沒有關係,就算是對自己有影響。發生就發生。發生了才看看如何算,又沒有要對任何人不好。也不計算(雖然我懂算),信因果,知道什麼要做的。生活過得好簡單。

看看,因字在果字裡。有意思。


Your Personality is Somewhat Rare (ISTP)


Your personality type is reserved, methodical, spirited, and intense.

Only about 6% of all people have your personality, including 3% of all women and 8% of all men

You are Introverted, Sensing, Thinking, and Perceiving.



24 Mar 2010

原來有做過測試,上次估計的也是一樣。別人要看我成別的,也沒有辦法,因為他們不知道有這些存在。

他們總是以為知道得最多的是我,事實是我什麼也不知道,最好的是什麼也不好告訴我。工作上的需要,自懂問。其他的,什麼也不想知道。因為不想知道,發生了什麼事也不會作聲。他們不會明白。

宿命

唯有可以這麼說。

可能

可能是我想得過多了。但願如此!

無論如何,我會守著不說老闆的不是(會寫,嘻),也要開始不說任何人。

有點傷心的是,對過人好卻換來這般的對待。就算最後的幾天,也沒有大聲跟她說話,雖然有搖頭。把日曆看了又看,想著發生了什麼事。還好端端的,卻一下子作了三百六十度的轉變。不想去想,卻想著。討厭。

Thursday, July 29, 2010

不明白為何要我見這麼多人,可以不請嗎?我不需要人。聽了今天說的,更加不想要。來的人要走,又是我的錯了。不想再聽重覆再重覆的話。

一千五百

要來做什麼??!!寫,都是為了應酬。拒絕,最好。我只想用錢來學yoga。

只是記錄

一個10% 的項目,講了九成的時間。
如果那是事實,為何三月時不跟我說,現在才說。她是否在說真話,不太想知道。她看是事實就是事實了。我把她說成他們。
這個月的又說我被人投訴。是嗎?當時又不說。無論發生了什麼事,不管了也管不到。是積極不回應。
不會跟她說什麼了,沒有能力也沒有必要不同意她,因為她一開始就不打算聽。
新任務是連職位名稱也變了,有趣的是我還要做著助理文員的工作,也要繼續招呼他。好笑不好笑,我是他的上司。
也不會說什麼了,問清楚事情如何安排,她要更改自然會,否則說來是沒用的。如果她不覺得好笑的話,我能接受。
曾想過過得一日得一日,實現了。
某某說我沒有某某資格,能勝任嗎?想想從前,他做差不多的事情,也沒有某某資格,看的數目是現在的十倍有多。
說我不敢跟高層交手,怎可以??!!稍稍說一句,蠻緊張的;所以什麼也不說了。
六項事情,沒有每項問一問,就給了一個不合格的分數。不說什麼了,她已經這樣做了。也不想公平不公平。
這些數字的影響,當然是錢。沒有關係,少少的數目(應該三萬也不到),不值得不高興。在外找回來。
說我老派,老就老,一點也不介意。

衝動想到,就考一個資格回來。一定可以做到。

Moving

Never will let me to stay in a comfort zone. Suddenly got the news that everything is changed. Good or bad??!! What I can do is try my best :) Actually I know how to show the "effort" which others like to see. It is only my choice whether I want to do in this way. If only for money, no way. I need to think of a reason to do it without pretending (no point to push myself to do things that causing no good).

Existing, work one month can spend two months is the only reason I stay :) Sure don't want to attend interview is another great reason. Everywhere same is the 3rd one.

Right or Wrong

Just commented by boss that I could not say in some way. Ok, fine. No need to have emotion as right or wrong, is there any standard??!!
 
I really don't know what happened and really don't know HOW. However I am not intended to find out the answer as sure there is NO. If then, just flow with the situation. If a person needs to think negative (but thought of positive), sure there is no way in helping him/her.
 
Better to use the energy to remember the dance steps as it really can help alot of people. Job that earns a living (here cannot expect too much but don't say the company is bad and I won't complain as it hurts myself), mind for what :)

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Shoulderstand

first from the chest into the midbody, opening your lower ribs, and then into the abdomen, helping the pubic bones curve away from the navel. When the entire spine is nourished by this upward energy, the pose becomes more comfortable and effective.

It is the point why and how we do shoulderstand. Legs straight or not, not so important.

If we always want Perfect in yoga, then most of the people may not do this. However I can tell from my own experience, no matter how the pose looks like, as long as do it properly then can benefits.

Teacher once taught us how to do supported shoulderstand with a chair. As long as our body is not strong enough to support the straight legs, using chair is a good way to have the same benefits. Teacher always reminds us not to struggle as it is not yoga.

Using your hands to keep your rib cage fixed

This is the purpose why using hands to support the body.

If unhurried, your body will continue to change, allowing a natural and lasting expansion of your range of motion.

Still Arguing

The staff is in boss's room for almost 2 hours, still arguing. Argue for what?? Performance not good I can say but sure the staff doesn't agree. Really hope he might leave then I can recruit another better person to assist me in the new role.
 
Now I won't argue with him (I am helping him but he sees me as negative, nothing I want to say), what he asks for I may do it for him. Not meant I am fear of him but just no point to waste the emotion. The more I can do means no need him to be here :)
 
For the new role, I like to joke whether he goes first or me. Sure with existing boss around, I am the one needed to stay :) But thing cannot be so sure as thing can change so fast that we may not have the chance to foresee it.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Don't Lose the Energy without a Purpose

Sometimes move with the wave is a great way to save energy for better purpose. We used to comment too much and wish things would be changed per what we wanted. How come we need to expect that much??!! Feel free to experience is better.

Read a Story

Just read a story (actually it is a real life happening). HOME to some people, it is really important. Cannot say much on this as it cannot be disclosed. What I can say is although the event is a sad one but it also with warm.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

課堂體驗

肩膀很累,做著一些手部帶動的動作的時候,做得很勉強。
能量在流動,一些舉手伸展的動作,手放下來的時候,感覺熱熱的。
seated twist,做得很漂亮,一點勉強也沒有。越twist 越有空間。
triangle(如果沒有記錯的話),望著鏡子,看到胸膛打開再打開。本來是單調教手的垂直度,覺得這不是辦法,於是停了下來,改為調整胸膛,手就自動跟著調整了。這才是方法。
老師說forward bend 後頭暈就是血壓低,backward bend 後頭暈就是血壓高。

課後分享,沒有話說。老師幫我說了wonderful,想想,都可以是這樣子的,沒有什麼想要。

活動日誌

來了一個四歲的小男孩,開始的時候跟我們玩了很短的時間,然後就什麼也不參與了。媽媽跟她坐在牆角直至活動完畢。

Friday, July 23, 2010

統一

基本上每天吃的都相同,晚餐會吃不同的,可都是那幾樣。明天早上會喝麥精維他奶,星期天就是豆漿。

Boring

Check check check, chase chase chase. So boring.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

山葵

新鮮的原來一點也不便宜,三寸左右要五十多。

Whatever

Colleague in other dept. said that alot of matters related to me (he didn't know this). It is. 4 out of 5 KPI which I need to contribute. Actually this is just liked in the previous job. The most, I like it.
 
Due to talent, I can't to be moved to a more senior position and I don't want to (don't give me any chances, actually current position is not in the wish or planning). I am not in comfort zone as always need to handle new tasks. Everything is fine now.

A Small Gift :)

Monday, July 19, 2010

無聊

不知道是說的無聊還是聽的無聊,每次都有通知她在哪,如果不是的話,她如何知道在哪(我通知和她阿姐通知不是一樣嗎??!!)。都是寫一下,奇怪的人們,遠離一點(可他們每個我都跟他們有聯繫)。

好想去

周日的活動,在兒時住過的屋村(已改建)。好想到那裡走一走。看何時有人來上班,教懂她就能放假了;或是沒來上班的時候也可以放假。

Breathing

Taught little girl how to breath. She could not make it. Asked her to place her little hand on my belly, she could feel the up and down. Asked her to place her little hand on my shoulder, she could know the shoulder should not be moved during breathing. Since she could not do the proper breathing, then I told her to raise each shoulder one by one then let it down one by one. She can manage.

She is so clever to understand what is to be correct.

還有,問她怕不怕,做了倒立和拱橋。後,她自己嘗試做倒立,應該覺得好玩。

又,教她做lord of the dance,她貼了在櫃上,跟我說好像一幅畫,又說好像跳芭蕾。她的想像力很好。

把學到的應用到她身上,可以。主要都是如何調整身體而令動作做到。

Cross the Legs - to be Fat

Little girl told mom not to cross the legs as it would make them fat. Funny she knows this. Guess she learnt it from TV.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

男孩

考試沒有一科合格的。怎算?他不願意拿書出來看一看也沒有辦法的,唯有叫妹妹幫一幫他(妹妹還沒有上小學)。跟妹妹說著媽媽教她如何讀那些字,然後讀給哥哥聽來默書。他不肯做,也沒有辦法。

男孩讀書學校的校長說想跟男孩爸爸見面,他說沒空,也沒有辦法。孩子是他的,不理,很不負責任。

老師的話

跟我們說層次,不是第一次說的了,我也明白。

回來,看到朋友S 的電郵,又重複地說還不懂應用閃燈。不學習怎會懂。回話給他,要他停止跟我說無聊的話。他確是討厭的,可今次沒有發自己脾氣。我的情緒如何,他不會理,只會繼續做回他自己。跟他說什麼也沒有用,他不想改變。要他停,是我不想看那些文字,因為看了總對自己有影響。

把自己推上一個層次,還是在徘徘徊徊,浪費精力,都是選擇。

跟自己說的,還未能做到用生命影響生命,不為別人製造麻煩(人家要麻煩自己,也學習不好抱怨),儘量給人方便,就是了。

Saturday, July 17, 2010

二十歲

那時做著什麼呢?
已經工作了兩年(在兩間公司工作過),認識了第一個男朋友(他算是我半個師傅)。那年,在銀行工作。
記憶所及,那時應該沒有什麼煩惱。
那時都算好學,考了中級的LCCI。

別話:跟他沒有見面十年了,不知道近況如何。

繼續吃

是星期一吃的。那鹽酥雞沒有油的可是炸過的(看紙袋),吃完所有東西後,卻膩了。

有點奇怪的,星期六才吃完相同的,可沒有感覺不舒服(可先後次序不同,而喝了酸梅冰茶)。

圓罐很難拍

前晚吃的

兩種食物都是即叫即做。

昨晚吃的

轉轉轉,都是吃這個,兩盒。好好味道。








來一個近鏡。








想單買泡菜。

曲奇

港島區又開新店,沒有吃過這個,買來吃。五十多一百克。

活動日誌

剛剛遇著巧巧,老師的三個蛋糕,一個自家制的。我買的熊熊曲奇,被老師收著。
今天來了很多的人,很多二十歲不到,人來了,心在哪??!!這是我對他們的感覺。不實在的生活,怎過的??!!
熱身時候,居然一人照顧兩個。可很多人啊!
老師一說他就想人來辦好,沒有可能的。跟另一助理一起說要他離開,那麼人就能辦好。總是覺得,被他照顧得太好。外邊的世界不一樣。
看了老師跳超人阿四,感覺好不一樣。同一事情,看怎樣做。

Friday, July 16, 2010

午飯

想去地面的一間,可要等,那麼就到樓上的,有驚喜。帶子啊!很多的白身魚。

“做晒”

可以說是把事情弄好了,一個人,其實都可以。

200 Only

Good to hear only increased by 200 only.

Don't Mind

Since there is no boiled water in the office, I bring it back from home. Try to compromise, feel better :)
 
There is nothing to resist. If there is things provided and we don't want, simply to get other substitution. Teacher told us, things happened around no matter we like it or not. What we can do the best is tried not to experience those made us unhappy. We can turn thing around to make life easier.


p.s. not sure in the future there is boiled water provided. If not, then I may buy a small heater.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

其實都幾悶

做得悶悶的,就走去看這看那,當然又被我找出事情來。登記登記再登記,嘻!

午飯

今天的有北寄貝,在同系的另一間。這間平時給的都是三文魚。

Gift :)

Although it is a small one but enough for a few lunch.

Body

Last week or early of this week still saying I am fat. It is fact I am getting fat. Stop to eat much for dinner (not feeling too well, not sick but cannot eat much). This morning find that the body is slimmer and I can see the muscle in abdominal. Sure it is not real muscle (too lazy to build up the muscle there) but I can see something there :)
 
Need there to be strong if want to be advance in yoga practise.

So Relaxing

Although there are alot to do (most of them is the admin. work), still carry with a relaxing mind. I know myself too well, feeling calm can make me more efficiency (more important is the accuracy).

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

What I Want

Yesterday night, suddenly thought that if I really want go to another place to experience life, I can go now. Feeling so great that I actually can do what I want to do. Sure I won't go at this moment. I still have a job and it is good. To work longer to have more money is better. Who knows what will happen next :)

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

上樓梯

只是走了兩層的樓梯(大概),大腿累得不得了(大腿提不高的,在樓梯走動的時候)。練習yoga 的時候沒有問題。發生了什麼事??!!

午飯

吃了這麼多次,今天首次有秋刀魚,可不是應節時間,有點腥(當然新鮮程度也有影響)。

Monday, July 12, 2010

4

Never to conduct so many interviews within 2-hour. Good luck!

p.s. finally only 2 came.

If......ok

Don't like the traditional management course. If ok, I will attend a 60-hour NLP training. Then next year (if still in the company), then attend an advanced course.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

爸爸煮

昨晚外出吃了花甲,爸爸也跟著弄,也加了粉絲,另加白菜仔。好好味道。

雲與飛鳥

倒影

就是站在這裡拍著雲。

合拍

看,它們多合拍(乘巴士時無聊拍)。

中環街市

活化的項目。

(在巴士裡隨拍)

課堂體驗

corpse,居然雙臂有點痹。
plank,十秒,好勉強。
table top 然後同一邊的手腳離地,第一次做得頗為穩定。右邊離地的時候比較好。
lunge twist,感覺到臀的位置有點礙事。太肥了。

Saturday, July 10, 2010

男孩

九月就有得測試,很快。



You Don't Make Waves



More than anyone else, you're happy to go with the flow. Life has enough waves without you making your own.

You don't really enjoy drama, though you don't mind watching it pass by... as long as you're not involved.

If chaos does come your way, you try to minimize it as much as you can.

You never like to feel like your life is out of control. There's no sea too calm for you.



現在的我,真的是這樣。一些不屬於我的,懶得說什麼。別人想什麼的,可以做到的都會配合(當然不會勉強自己)。

零嘴

見有新出品,買來吃。兩款也不好吃。

喝的

似不似糖水??!!








其實是飲料,麥記出品。

無與有

他總是看到沒有的,可我卻看到很多很多。

某晚吃的

看似炒河,是蝦子撈河。很膩,吃不完。其實之前剛吃了一個清真牛肉餅。

亂拍

上星期日喝的。邊喝邊拍,沒能看到鏡頭,試試看拍成怎樣。

天空

在商場裡看到這天空(人在七樓),拍下。

午餐

某晚特意去找這個,找不到。上網找來了名,今天吃了。好好吃(不用醬油什麼的)。

小店是兩口子經營,是韓國人,不懂廣東話的。

活動

其實早就要睡了,明早去活動課。

跳了超人阿四,好好玩。
終於把上星期學的舞步記了下來。
老師不在,學員家長都有點hea。自己玩得好開心。

佩服

很佩服朋友S 的精力,差不多每天都有妙想天開的事。看文章,人家說龍井,他都可以看成這是濃茶。好想知道,有什麼是清清楚楚的。

要信自己

買來的新衣,穿上身後,左右邊有點不平衡。有懷疑過是自己身體的問題,後把衣對疊看看,呵呵!

Friday, July 9, 2010

被見

不知什麼的CxO 要跟我面談,不準備了(其實在想準備不準備的當兒,想說的話已經說了一遍),有話直說就好。在網上查看了這高層的資料,互聯網真好。

今天

走了去拿東西。其實真的不太介意做著現在的(沒有發過脾氣,不過有點精神分裂似的,做後自己檢查和簽名),時間好快就過;可哪有這麼便宜。不知為何,總認為請到人也很快走。

Thursday, July 8, 2010

感覺良好

繼續做著文員工作,很有耐性地做。站在影印機前,做做standing pose(如果不是在公開地方,會做tree pose 的),呵呵!

Cannot be Void

Would like to know if it is a mistake, then how? Really don't know how a new comer can ensure there is no mistake (actually it is hard for anyone to identity which is which as there are a few types). Anyway, I will ask the procedure if we really need to void a number. If not allowed to do so, then send the incorrect document out. Easy, no eye see :)

If the no. is for monitoring, would like to know how's about those documents sent are not for system record.

Already have a list without skipping the no. They asked us to prepare it but not plan to use it. Then why we need to do so??!!

What I am trying to say is "it is a nonsense requirement". They are blindly to do something without considering the fact. Just like they said they won't do any checking. They will do the correction if we found it and notify them. It means they don't like us to do so much checking. It is easy to lose a few thousands but just not plan to hire one more person.

See when there is someone to notice there is a need to have a revenue leakage program.

My God

ohhhh! almost to interview all.

p.s. Some are not planning to have a half day part time, then why applied??!!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

多事

又再一次跟自己說不好太多事,朋友的想法就如玩大富翁,由他想想吧!反正成事的可能性很低。跟他說什麼也不會聽,剩點力氣吧。

過了就不想了

發現,過去了的事情就不想了。真好。

So Many Folders

Opened a few folders since starting to do the admin. and clerical job. I am sure a systematic person :)

Starting to notice that there is less emotion during handling some of the tasks that I think there are ways to improve (no matter it can be automated or due to some unnecessary steps). Since I don't have time or means to change it, then better to live with it. Emotion never can help unless we admit it and be patient to find out what caused it.

別話:是日只上了半天班,事情弄得差不多。其實,可以不請人回來的。

Monday, July 5, 2010

Pretend to be Positive

This is for friend S. Already left messages in the pictures posted in Facebook. If you really can "see through", try to figure out what I want to say. "through" is not that easy. Recall the days in playing tennis, I hardly did a good follow through. While slow motion, I did it very well. I would intentionly did the follow through after hitting the ball but it was not that case.

To Take Leave Finally

Today keep on to inform the errors created by her (need her to amend). When I come back from lunch, just see the email saying she was not feeling well and needed to leave.

別話:人不在,做著她的工作,還可以啊!慢慢做,時間足夠的。做了什麼,寄了速遞、送電郵、收集文件、開了單。

Just Plug It

Finally have time to do the setting of the new machine. Once plug in and get the electricity and it works :)
 
Normally I will not ask others for the answer of the 5W and will give myself a try first. It is why I am an action type of person. Always believe do it then may have the chance to have the answer and doing nothing sure without anything.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Supine Leg Lift Pulses

這個,做的時候沒有“硬硬”的了。

source of the picture

18 Apr 08

把膝拉近身軀,伸直的腳好穩定。

課堂體驗

熱身還沒完,已經出汗,這令人累,沒多心機。
high lunge,腳伸得不直。節奏快了點,給點時間可以慢慢調節。
tree,右腳在地的時候好像雙腳在地一樣,不想把左腳放下來。
high lunge 手按著膝,原來手腕痛的可以把手反過來,掌心向上。
downward facing dog,在鏡望到的臀部,好像左右邊不平衡。
暫時為止,balance 和 twist 做得不錯。

智慧

朋友也問我這個,現時來說只懂學習不執著和寬容(昨晚的測試,兩次跟服務生對話,很有耐性,沒有一點的情緒。年輕人就是這樣子,能背上程序已經很好,要他們解釋有點難度,氣來也幫助不了他們)。

工作上,別人不改我來改(改了慢慢就能變成規矩,有了規矩人人都要跟著),不想不快樂。做多一點又如何,沒有能力說服對方於是從自己做起。

不是必然

昨晚跟朋友吃飯(很久沒有二人同行了),有人問她生命的意義,她說是生活,然後被問生活的意義(我也問這個),她說不知道。她問我會如何回答,不用想就說了,一天比一天活得更好,這就是意義。

原來,自己擁有的,不是必然。不用藉口,也不是必然的。

不太用力去活是事實,不想說會改過來(說沒用,要行動就不會說),可知道要用心去體驗能體驗的。

可愛的回應

跟老師說我又要請人了,如果有人真心想做,一定給機會。跟他說走的原因是讓她過試用期就辭職,他回應了“癡線”這兩個字。真的可愛。

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Six

if Sixes experienced their protective figures as abusive, unfair, or controlling, they will internalize this relationship with authority and feel themselves always at odds with those who they believe have power over them. They walk through life fearing that they will be "in trouble" and unjustly punished, and adopt a defensive, rebellious attitude as a protection from the cruel protective figure they project into many of their relationships. Sixes who suffered extremely dysfunctional childhood environments may have been so devalued or ill-treated by their protective figure that they end up leading self-destructive, wasted lives as they unconsciously live out their protective figure’s negative image of them.

這段,很像朋友S。不知道他看後如何反應??!!

團組

一個團隊的產生,一定是主腦人物對事情有很深的認識,生命影響生命,信這個。

朋友突然告訴他想弄一個網站出來,讓攝影的freelancer 聚在一起。不說什麼,他懂攝影嗎?近來才知道用大機卻是半自動的(可他告訴我他朋友說他技巧還不錯)。不是要去批評他,不想這樣也不想浪費時間。只想他知道,意義是什麼。

不太知道他想做什麼,有點擔心就是他弄來了不知什麼的人。如果真的做什麼(他有點運氣的,要做的都可以做上一兩次),不要弄出什麼意外。我怕的是,有風化事情發生。不知為何會跟這個連起來,就是想到。

攝影好的人,我認為,總有出路。

有節目

會去跳舞班幫手,這次的對象年紀比較小。跟他們一起,很單純的。需要這點力量。

1 Jul 2010

還以為是小朋友,可不是。很多的義工很多的家長。
老師分享了某女孩的故事,她的親人也在。看了她生命中最後的一幅畫,很多的色彩,雖然不是看得到的圖案,可看到是立體的。這是她對生命的看法。她只有十一歲。
要帶他們去看畫展,嘻嘻!有個男學員跟著我。
分享中說:大家都很有吸引力,在這裡學習人與人的相處。
這個組織,上次也有去社區中心跟老人家表演。一位家長說,老人家說我們的舞蹈比粵曲還好。老師說會為他們安排多一點演出。
記性差了很多,新學的簡單舞步,當場不太記得,要望著別人來做。

世界真細小

人人常歡笑 不要眼淚掉
時時懷希望 不必心裡跳
在那人世間 相助 共濟
應知人間小得俏

世界真細小小小
小得真奇妙妙妙
實在真係細世界
嬌小而妙俏

柔柔陽光照 兼有朗月耀
良朋同歡聚 相依相對笑
萬里難隔阻 心裡情長照
應知人間小得俏

世界真細小小小
小得真奇妙妙妙
實在真係細世界
嬌小而妙俏

Friday, July 2, 2010

Anger

Not sure it is anger or just inpatient. Anyway, if it can be changed, sure worth to pay effort.
 
What happened? Why need to give me all the things????!!!! Today cannot do then next Monday.

Tell me Don't Know

Asked her to assist to set up a new machine. Not even take it out but told me she thought she didn't know how to do. A person can be so different just within 3 months. Last time after she knew she needed to go, she kept on to help by her best (very good therefore we asked her back).

Thursday, July 1, 2010

弟弟說

跟弟弟說起女孩(其實也不小了)的辭職,他說他們就是希望舒服。簡單直接。

Introspection

Knowledge can change you if you are willing to use it in the process of introspection. Introspection is the process of becoming self-aware. Introspection is actually risky. Thomas Mann says, "Introspection is the first step towards transformation… after knowing himself, nobody can continue being the same." Do not attempt introspection unless you willing to risk being transformed out of the comfort zone of your type. Peter Senge in The Fifth Discipline tells us that the "… structures of which we are unaware hold us prisoner." Becoming aware of hidden structure of your personality sets you free but also gives you full responsibility for yourself.

One

Anger, in particular, is a powerful motivation for Ones. When they are confronted with circumstances which disappoint or displease them, anger becomes a form of fuel which launches them into action. Indeed, anger, rightly understood is an instinctual response to a situation we are not satisfied with. It is the energy that allows us to say "no." Some Ones become conscious of this, and use their anger constructively.

好多時都是這樣,看不過眼去找找看,又被我找到需要的。

一號仔沒有大的情緒問題,可別人就怕一號仔,因為他總有話說,關於怎樣做得更好。

好似

突然想起,發生中的事跟以前很類似。好想好想轉系統,想玩。

Potential To Be

But as an integral aspect of healing, we must be willing and able to tolerate whatever lies within. The Enneagram reminds us that the darkest passions of human nature are what we need to acknowledge in ourselves and be willing to bring to light. Indeed, if we are really honest with ourselves, we must acknowledge that, under certain circumstances, we, too, could commit murder, suicide, or acts of terrorism. It teaches us that we cannot condemn anyone else for being "evil" without acknowledging the presence of the same impulses in ourselves. Each of us is a potential terrorist in our own hearts; each of us has been a terrorist of our own soul.

Four

In response to anxiety, they turn inward, becoming self-conscious, particularly about the negativity they discover in themselves. To offset their negative feelings, they use their imaginations to make their lives more bearable. As a result, average Fours begin to withdraw from ordinary life. They become self-absorbed and do not learn how to relate to people or how to manage in the practical world. They feel like outsiders, somehow flawed and different from others, unable to break through the barrier of self-consciousness that separates them from easy commerce with the world.

And if they are unhealthy, their negative feelings feed upon themselves because Fours have closed themselves off from any other influences. Unhealthy Fours are so completely alienated from others, and ironically, even from themselves, that they despair of ever finding a way out of their excruciating self-consciousness. They realize that their search for self has led them into a world of useless fantasies and illusions. Understanding only too clearly what they have done to themselves, and fearing that it is too late to do anything about it, unhealthy Fours hate and torment themselves, turning against themselves to destroy what they have become.

怪不得總是反反復複的。

by not expressing their feelings, average Fours undermine the possibility of discovering themselves by getting caught in endless self-absorption. They become aware of being aware of themselves—their consciousness is filled with little more than fantasies and memories, ultimately leading to illusions, regrets, and a wasted life.

嘩!這裡的某些字眼,我也有跟他說過。

Fours may not know who they are, but they certainly believe they know who they are not.

Fours also begin to develop a sense of ego identity based on their difference from others. There were few qualities in their parents that they identified with, so Fours began to inventory all the things that they were not—all of the ways in which they were unlike the people around them. Eventually, this sense of difference becomes a strongly developed and defended part of their self-image and many Fours have difficulty seeing the many ways in which they are like everyone else. To be "ordinary" becomes a frightening prospect, since a sense of "being unique" feels like one of the only stable building blocks of their identity.

不知道他敢不敢把文章看完,我看後都有點怕,那麼的真實。四號仔,好難接受現實的。

沒有加一

有差不多兩個月沒去了,可還給我不需要加一。可,自己添水無咖啡又無。不太想去,因為這兩樣東西是比較吸引我的。

九點多就起來了

昨晚是淩晨兩點多才睡。

掌紋

左邊虎口位好像有新的掌紋出現,那裡感覺有點微微的不適。

都是拍下照片等遲些來比對。

《Personality Types》

by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson

要去買這書(網上看,看得眼很累)。

按按這按按那,嘩!運費跟書價一樣。幸好,可以取消。想懶,都是在香港找找看。

如果要買,不如連那兩本好想要的yoga 書一起買。嘩!運費要USD24。好貴。寄美國本地也要USD11。如果要朋友帶過來,才省一百塊港幣,又不用這麼麻煩。

別話:上次話想買的書已經不覺得有價值要買,看了書管理都是做不好的(我說我)。

其實

她知道我的計畫嗎?問都沒有問過,沒有機會告訴她。我不想找另一個,原因是都是找來差不多的。老闆有老闆的計畫,我有辦法轉一轉。兩個人,有什麼不可以真心談。這三個月,又不是沒有試過我不在。沒有問題啊!公司有公司的規矩,表面工夫,大家合作就好。做測試,告訴我是八號(如果她沒有說錯我沒有記錯),頗合理(不過她驚訝的)。嘗試跟她談一談,一開始她就抗拒了。

剛剛看一看八號仔,好像。

會叫她一起吃飯,不過她現在好怕我。“點都好,都要叫她一下的”。

Eights attempt to defend themselves by rejecting others first. The result is that average Eights become blocked in their ability to connect with people or to love since love gives the other power over them, reawakening their Basic Fear.

The more they attempt to make themselves impervious to hurt or pain (whether physical or emotional), the more they “shut down” emotionally to become hardened and rock-like.

原來是這樣。她跟我說她沒有hea 來做,問她,為何這麼多錯誤又不跟程序。給了我不想談的表情,而人也開始走動了。

Eights are one of the three types in the Instinctive Center. All three personality types of this Center attempt to keep the environment from affecting them in different ways—Eights by dominating it, Nines by ignoring it, and Ones by striving to perfect it. Eights tend to assert themselves powerfully in the environment so that no one and nothing in it can have power over them.

還以為一號仔跟八號仔是不同世界的人,原來同在一處。