Monday, May 31, 2004

English Mistake

Below is the comment from my friend. I asked him to gave me advise for my better english writing.

Unclear: I not aim to follow them but to think how good or how bad their actions are.

A clearer one: My intention isn't to copy from them but to think how good or how bad their actions are.

--
Not correct: Are you feeling dull in your life?

Correct: Do you feel dull with your life?

Follow Through

From dictionary, the definition of follow through is "to complete the movement of hitting, kicking or throwing a ball by continuing to move your arm or leg in the same direction".

I learn this term from tennis. Remember that I have written one passage by taking tennis game as our lives. It is more than true.

One of my colleagues said tennis was a dull game. I won't comment whether it is a funny game but I sure he didn't know how to play tennis.

My other friends may think that I am crazy as I am still learning forehand in these 5 years.

I just know that once I don't have a thorough basic technique, I will never can be a good player. I don't mind to spend a little bit more time to ensure my basic is strong enough.

If you are able to persist in playing a good follow through, you may gain so much in the process.

Believe me! Have a try!

Sunday, May 30, 2004

說話的技巧

有人說﹕說話的好與壞﹐在於包裝。我不太同意這樣的說法。

說話的目的是什麼﹖我們一定要把它弄清楚。不然的話﹐我們溝通的目的便達不成﹐哪可以說成是成功呢﹖

說話不是單單把我要說的話﹐說完便成了。我們要的是要確保聽的人﹐能夠弄清我們想要表達的意思。如果不是的話﹐我們便是空口說白話。

那些自認有良好溝通技巧的﹐是否需要好好的檢討一下呢﹖

我自知沒有很好的說話技巧﹐我時常留意他人的說話的方法﹐好好的學習。
原來世上﹐真的有書痴。如果不是的話﹐那有人去寫這樣的一本

The Value of Reading

Last night my friend told me that his colleague commented that he spent too much time in reading. This was the second time I heard people commented on too much reading. Reading here is referred to those knowledgeable one.

I wonder the rationale behind this unreasonable comment.

There is unknown knowledge in each book. Spend time in reading sure we need to sacrifice other activities. Is there any negative impact on reading?

If I don't like reading, I won't give my opinion as not to read too much. I respect the others' favorites, unless it is a bad habit.

Where to learn?

We can learn everywhere and from everybody.

From a woman magazine calling Jessica, I learnt the "cake theory". It is from a lady living in China. She said most of the people had lost the creativity. She said that we only could follow the cooking book to make a cake. We never tried to do it by our own creativity.

It seems correct. We have lost our brave to try new things. We are only willing to follow others. Wait and see is the saying that we use most.

I tend to notice the behavior of all the people around me. My intention isn't to copy from them but to think how good or how bad their actions are. Sure this standard is according to my own.

From my observation, I notice that there are a lot of things that are unable to explain by my limited knowledge. Maybe there is no need for us to assign an answer to each situation.

Our Habit

Do you have a habit? How long do you keep it as your habit?

We need a pattern to live, therefore our pattern form as a habit. On the other hand, we need a change to enlighten our lives.

So when you notice there is a change, it may be a good sign that we have found our new insight. It also applies to your friends. Next time when you notice they change a little bit, you may say congratulation to them.

每一本書

每一本書﹐都是作者的精心傑作。在讀者的眼中﹐可能並不是這樣的想。

今天我讀了一本我已經將它視為不好看的書。正因為我讀了這本書﹐所以我有靈感寫出這裡的話。

很多的時候﹐我們都是太過主觀。很多的時候﹐我們都不是拿出自己的心﹐去認真的了解和欣賞。很多的時候﹐我們都太過自以為是﹐白白的浪費了很多學習的機會。

就從今天開始﹐好好的珍惜我們看過的每一本書。在那裡﹐有著很多我們沒能了解的東西﹐而這些東西﹐就是我們需要的。

Saturday, May 29, 2004

To Run 2,600 Meters

Do you think it is possible to run 2,600 meters in 12 minutes? I think it is achievable. However you need to have regular practice to attain this goal.

My colleague told me that he was only able to run for 4 minutes. This guy likes football but there was a long time he didn't play the game.

Actually I wasn't surprise of his saying. To run 2,600 meters, we need to take care of our breath pattern. We not only need a good physical condition but also we need to notice the mental one as well.

From this incident, I learn the importance of preparation in order for us to make a thing done. This includes our mental thought.
We all want a great life. However, it seems that people have lost the direction in their living. Reason? I am not an appropriate person to answer this as I am still finding my way in my life.

This book may help us to know our steps. Or better to say, we need to enjoy every moment in our lives, especially the present moment.

Friday, May 28, 2004

The Joy of Sharing

I love reading and I like to share my thought about reading too. It is so good to share what I have read. Also I like to know how others think about a book.

It is the joy of sharing. Sharing may make us closer.

Thursday, May 27, 2004

Do you feel dull with your life?

It seems is a good book. Again it is an expensive book.

I love the concept to think "out of the box". Our thinking may be looked weird at the beginning. However as if there is no such thought, how the invention or new things can be appeared.

We need a child heart. But all of the adults already forgot where their hearts are. And we all are feeling so tired in dealing with day to day dull work.
幾米的新書

Comment on My Blog

Today I receive another comment on my blog. It tells me the importance of a proper headline.

My friend said sometimes he found my writing was confusing as there was no focus in the passage. He told me that as if there was a subject, then he might know what the content would be.

As he is one of my regular readers, therefore I need to take his advise seriously. Improvement? Sure you can see it.

Simple Life

Simple life is to live in a way as simple as you can.

However we tend to attach to something or someone. Like we want to make a huge amount of money or to depend on your parents or boyfriend to make a decision.

If you are care free, I sure you can enjoy the peaceful of a simple life.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

"Immature love says: I love you because I need you.
Mature love says: I need you because I love you." by Erich Fromm.

Which one would you count yourself as, the former or the later one?
“鼓勵” 在英語中是“encourage”,意思是“灌進勇氣”。這兩句話﹐是來自這本書的

我們時常說﹐中文是很有深度的﹔而英文也是。我從來也沒有想過鼓勵和勇氣的關係﹐原來是這樣的。我們在鼓勵他人努力的同時﹐也需要把勇氣交給他們。

這勇氣便是讓他們感到有空間去發展﹐勇于承擔後果﹐在困難的時候﹐也不會輕易放棄。
今天是假期﹐我沒有外出﹐只是留在家中工作。

我不知道﹐我是真的愛上我的工作﹐還是其他的原因﹐我喜歡在家裡工作。還是我喜歡面對電腦﹐做點事。

突然我發現一個很有趣的地方﹐我很喜歡問自己為什麼。我很喜愛問自己一些我自己也沒有答案的問題。

沒有答案的問題﹐還是問題嗎﹖
My friend commented that I tend to write a bit long sentence. It may affect the effectiveness of understanding.

I will bear it in mind and aim to improve it.

Silence

"Always conduct a quick internal check before speaking. Does the remark you are about to make or the answer you are about to give benefit your business and other people? If not, keep silent. Silence is often stronger than words."

Above is sent by my friend. I believe he copied it from some net
reading.

In more occasions, I notice such advise as well, including living with your friends and family. I am not going to doubt about the effectiveness of keeping silent. However if all people are tend to keep silent, then who will talk.

Sometimes we talk for our pressure releasing or aim to share our
happiness to each other. Everyone needs a person who is willing and
able to listen.

Ops...I got it. I think it is not wise for me to comment others' saying. Keep Silent!

You Care?

Upon reviewing the process map provided by a consultant, I found that most of the people around are very selfish. I better to say, they are very short-sighted. They only focus on their own task but are not willing to consider the person whom perform the following tasks.

I am still lucky that I work with some people (though not enough) whom with this good attitude - to care of others before taking the actions or making the decision.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

Today I tried to get a definite YES or NO answer from a consultant. Result? You sure can guess it. I couldn't get it right away.

After that I tried to re-phase my sentence and wish to get a YES or No. I was not success again. Finally I asked directly that I needed a YES or NO answer.

I wonder why people are so unwilling to give an answer. What's the concern do they have? Maybe I need to think of this question not in a rational way. Then I may able to answer this question by myself.

Monday, May 24, 2004

Today I receive a file from my boss, in which it tells us the rules in life. After showing the 20 rules, then there was a message telling us not to keep the file but to forward to others. Then you life will be brighten.

I am not doubt about the rules but the way to brighten our lives. Just a few seconds reading and then pass the file to others can really work! I really wonder.

Why the writer not to remind the reader to keep the file and take it out always to refresh what we have learnt!

As if a person just simply forward the file and discard it, I wish him/her good luck and it is what I can do for him/her.
Do you believe a life-long relationship? I have doubt about it.

Reason is not that I not trust it but it is too early for me to say "I believe".

Yesterday I received a message from my friend who lives in US. He didn't sent me message for awhile as his computer was down. When I asked him whether he had forgotten about me and he replied that he would remember me always.

I am not sure whether he will really remember me always but just a simple saying can let me happy for awhile.

Sunday, May 23, 2004

"The less you talk, the more you're listened to." by Abigail Van Buren.

I agree that we learn while we are listening. When we talk, we only try to convince others to agree with us. While we are listening, our knowledge will have a chance to increase.

At this moment, we think we are right. However in the next moment, are we sure we won't be wrong? Don't be too self-confident, otherwise we may lose many good chances to improve ourselves.
"A man should never be ashamed to admit he has been in the wrong, which is but saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday." by Alexander Pope.

Do you have such brave? Actually we feel good when we admit that we are wrong. The most concern person of our wrong doing is just ourselves, not others.

"Knowledge without Action is useless. Action without Knowledge is foolishness." by Sai Baba.

Very agree with the statement. There was a real example in my work life. I saw a colleague who was a very responsible person. However her work was not that good. Although she had the total confidence but she was not knowing that action without knowledge is foolishness.

As if I don't have such knowledge, I won't pretend that I know but to admit that I don't know. The fastest that we can admit we don't know, the fastest that we can get the solution from others whom they know.
Found this from "What Women Want Men to Know":
"We mean what we say, and if we ask you for something, it's not a frivolous request - it's because it's very important to us. And this is because YOU are very important to us."

When time passes, we feel our importance to you may diminish. We know from you that you don't have any changes but we just feel that you spend less time and less caution to us. Can we say that you take us for granted?

Saturday, May 22, 2004

有些人﹐靜靜的為自己﹐為那些我們不可以預測的變化做好準備。

這些準備﹐好像我們買保險一樣﹐讓我們身處突然發生的事情的時候﹐也可以靜靜的處理。

終身學習﹐永遠的追求知識﹐也是這個道理。當我們發覺自己的知識不足夠的時候﹐才去學習﹐那已經是太遲了。因為當你覺得自己擁有那些你認為需要的知識的同時﹐新的知識已經存在你的身邊。
用平靜的心去看這個世界﹐你可以做得到嗎﹖

當我們的心是平靜的時候﹐我們看到的事物應該是比較可愛的﹔我們聽到的聲音﹐也應該是比較悅耳的。

當我們看到的、聽到的﹐都是一些好東西的時候﹐我們的心可以不平靜嗎﹖
"Whether you think that you can or that you can't, you are usually right." by Henry Ford.

If it is true, then why we need to persuade others to do something that others say they can't or vice versa.

As if we can let others to be themselves, then we can have more peace. However if there is no persuasion, do we still have so many inventions or improvement?

Sometimes we are too lazy to act on our own. We need somebody to push us.

As to determine whether the above statement is correct or not, all should depend on the situation. Or what we want to achieve from our action. Everyone is different.
A strong feeling that I need to have a change. However I am not sure what's the change should be. Or I just need a refresh, to learn new things or to meet new people. Maybe to have a hair cut can do which is I don't know.

Today weather is not hot, therefore it is good for me to play tennis. Or to have a good game can release my curious in knowing the change that I need to have.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

"Let no-one ever come to you without leaving better and happier" by Mother Teresa.

I know I can't do this but only read this also can feel better. To give a warm smile to others, also can make ourselves feeling better. However we are just too unwilling to do so.

We always aim to get something back for all of our actions. We may always hear people saying that the world isn't fair. Does fair mean so much to us?

If you think it is unfair, you already lost the time to enjoy the happiness. Why not we let ourselves to spend every moment in a better and happier sense?

布瓜的世界

幾米的布瓜的世界﹐是一本百看不厭的書。我已經看了四遍。

這本書﹐可以看到童真﹐也可以看到成年人的無奈。就是一個“為什麼”﹐便成為書中的主題。簡簡單單﹐但是卻無比的複雜。

每次看罷這本書﹐都感到舒暢無比。你也找個機會﹐看看這書吧﹗
My color of today is light green.

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

To Be Happy

Today I am reading the "Calm for Life", there mentioned that we need to think of the motive for a consequence/goal. The definition of motivation in the book is "motivation is the "Why?" in life."

I try to think what is the motive of my anger in work. What can I get from my anger? Through the process, I sure know that my anger is of no value. Now the question comes: Why did I need to be angry?

I want to be calm. I can feel happy if I am calm. So happy is my motivation to be calm. Ok! I get it now. I need to be happy in my work in order for me to achieve the peace of mind.
Again it is come from Paul Wilson. "Sometimes suspend logic and your
need for proof."

I think I really need to print the above out and paste it in my diary as to remind myself not to be too logical in every aspect.

Like what my friend has told me, to say it in an indirect way is
sometimes a fun of communication. Sure there is a logic way for
everything but the question is: Do we need to know all the fact?

Rainbow is beautiful is because there are seven colors. Each color is
interrelated to each other. It is impossible for us to ask why the color sequence is liked that, red comes first, follow the orange and the last one is purple. Just take the time to enjoy the beautiful scene when you have the chance.
Am I reacting too fast? Do I need to react fast? The answer is Yes or
No.

Sometimes when you are unable to respond instantly, in contrast, others may act faster than you. On the other hand, when you react too fast, others may not be able to understand their situation. As a result, they won't provide the support that you need to complete your task, although the task is beneficial to all.

Our ego always want us to be the first one and the one who deserves for the merit. Will you act fast or wait for others to action?
Below is copied from "Calm for Life" by Paul Wilson.

"Expect nothing, accept everything." It is really an art of living. Is it easy to do so? I don't think so.

When we are unhappy or feeling stressful and frustrated, it is because we are expecting something and don't want to accept what we are having now.

Like me, I have more than enough clothing. However when I want to buy a new dress and I can't find one that I like with reasonable price, I won't be calm. It is not a feeling of unhappy or something liked that. But just the want of buying a new dress will rest in my mind for a moment. I may not able to concentrate on other things.

Did you experienced the same? Think that you did.
可能是一種病態﹐老是不愛去睡覺。

為什麼我們白天要做工﹐而晚上睡覺呢﹖不可以倒轉嗎﹖

今天我對同事說﹕我要放慢動作﹐我要養身。

看似近來的壓力水平真的高了點。

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

“我們都不想自己受罪,所以情願犧牲愛情。”

以上是從網上節錄下來的。如果你還沒有感受何為愛情﹐你怎樣可以說你要犧牲呢﹖沒有愛過﹐哪會感受那受罪的感覺﹖就是因為你受了傷﹐你才會說﹕放棄吧﹗
A guy says: You are so all the way up there. I feel that my advises to you are just not good enough.

He is not the first one telling me about this. I know I am independent but I never admit myself as that kind of person. Actually I want to be weak but I know when time comes, I won't allow myself to be weak.

It is a bit funny when we try to look into ourselves. We set a lot of CANs and CAN'Ts inside ourselves.

Monday, May 17, 2004

身體的感應

你能夠感應你自己的身體嗎﹖多多留意一下自己﹐這便是養身之道。

當你感到煩悶的時候﹐由它自由的發泄﹐可是你也要記住﹐自己是身體的主人。在最短的時間裡﹐你要趕快的做會自己的主人﹐靜靜的把自己的心放回它應當的位置﹐好好的照顧它。

其實﹐我們也要多謝我們身體的感應﹐好的壞的﹐就是我們能夠留意我們心的狀況的好朋友。
I requested my friend to give comment on my English. He told me it would be fine as I would do the editing over the times.

It is a very useful advise. When I read the passage and find the sentence is not smooth enough, then it is time for me to do the fine tuning.

Through the process, I may learn how to have a better presentation. It may help on my daily communication as well.
Apart from trust, worrying about what will happen is the second worst in this world.

We fear to live in a situation that we don't know about our future. This future is not talking about 3 years or 5 years but few months afterwards.

It is one of the reasons why we need psychological treatment in these years. This type of course is very popular nowadays.

Sunday, May 16, 2004

Chatted with my friend who lives in London, he said that it was only a job after I told him I was not happy in my work.

What's a simple but useful remark! It is just a job and it is no need for me to be too serious.
在劉墉的“把話說到心窩裡2”裡﹐有著以下很妙的句子﹐女孩子看罷﹐一定有著會心微笑。男孩子呢﹖一定很有同感。

當你對一個女人說﹕你最近越來越漂亮了。
那女人可能會回問你﹕我以前不漂亮嗎﹖

我也時常說這樣的話﹐不過大多數的時候﹐都是鬧著玩的﹐不是認真的。
我們時常說﹐我們要懂得珍惜。可是﹐怎麼樣去珍惜呢﹖是不是靜靜地去感受﹐便是珍惜﹖

突然間﹐不懂怎樣才是珍惜。每一秒鐘﹐眨眼便過去了﹐還趕不上講上一句話﹐前一秒鐘已經成為過去了。

是不是當你有話想對他/她說的時候﹐便要講給他/她聽﹖珍惜我們的每一分﹐每一秒。
Someone asks: What's the quality of love?

A guy will say: I treat my girlfriend good while I am with her.

A girl will say: My boyfriend should think of me by all times. He needs to be besides me when I am not happy. He needs to take away my tears while I am crying.

To me, the quality of love is that you know how to cherish the one that gives you love.
我的朋友問我﹐為何我開始用英文寫作起來﹐我也不知道為什麼。我只知道感覺上﹐某些話題用英文寫起來是比較好一點。

可能我是希望別人, 能夠給我一點在英文上的提點﹔又可能在那個星期裡﹐我說英文的時候比說中文的還要多。

倒回來用中文﹐感覺是有點困難。我覺得英文絕對是比較直接的﹐廣東人寫中文﹐因為不是我手寫我口﹐是需要一點時間來作思考的。
重看劉墉的“把話說到心窩裡2”﹐那裡說﹕施人慎勿言﹐受施當言報。

很同意﹐如果我們能夠這樣做的話﹐真的可以避免很多不必要的衝突。但是﹐如果我是那個施人﹐永遠也聽不到那受施的一方的感謝﹐該怎麼辦﹖

我們可以大方﹐也應該盡可能大方﹐但是我們不可以永遠的作為大方的一群。沒有了互動的交流﹐大方的人﹐慢慢的也變得自私起來。

能夠大方的人﹐是絕對不願意看到自己是一個自私的人﹐所以他們便對自己說﹕施恩莫望報。這是令自己能夠開懷的方法﹐絕對是對自己好一點的做法。

Saturday, May 15, 2004

Someone will say: Don't believe the words from a guy.

I will say: I tend to trust him. As if there is no trust, then sure there is no love.

Love makes you trust somebody. In return, trust strengthens love. When you trust him, you feel he is close to you. When you starts to query what he has told you, the distance is there.

Do I believe my trust? Seem that I am querying towards my trust instead of other things.
It is so funny. When you know someone may not appear in a day, you won't expect he/she may come. You can then concentrate on your work.

However when you know there is a possibility that someone may appear, then you wait for him/her. Sure you can do your work but you may not able to have 100% concentration.
實在﹐不實在

老實的人真的比較吃虧嗎﹖在我認為﹐可能是的。

老實人就因為是老實﹐當他們做了一些不太老實的事情的時候﹐他們會感到不好意思。就因為這樣﹐相比與那些不老實的人來說﹐老實人便來得吃虧。

老實人做事﹐是有一定的程序的。那些不老實的人﹐他們是沒有道理可言的。正因為此﹐我們不知道不老實的人的依歸﹐這也是老實的人所吃虧之處。

這本﹐我沒有看過﹐但是我相信它不是教導我們做一個不實在的人﹐而是叫那些實在的人﹐不要太執著罷了。
在電視節目“心晴行動抗抑鬱”裡﹐聽到這樣的話﹕

在三十歲前﹐我們對於我們的目標﹐一定要永不言敗。可是﹐在四十歲後﹐對於我們辦不到的事情﹐便要有決心去把它放下。

我很同意這樣的說法。這不是我們不願意承擔﹐而是我們是沒有足夠的能力﹐去承受那麼多的責任。當我們到了某一個階段﹐我們所承擔的責任﹐是越來越多的﹔當我們感覺到對於這些承擔﹐是有所壓力的話﹐便是我們叫停的時候。
壓力是從哪裡來﹖當然是從我們的身心裡來。

真的是從我們的身心裡來嗎﹖真的。如果不是的話﹐我們怎麼樣可以感受到壓力﹖

好了﹗看似要消除壓力﹐唯一可以辦到的便是我們自己﹐對嗎﹖

放開點﹐不要執著﹐我們便可以不受壓力的影響。
為什麼你不明白的事情﹐你會認為別人也不明白的﹖你把你的不明白﹐說成是講話的人說得不清楚。為什麼你不想一想﹐是你的不留心去聽別人的話﹐所做成的結果﹖

Friday, May 14, 2004

Feeling so good after read the extract of this book. The most important to me is that we can change our suspicious to trust.
This book tells you how to say I love you in 10,000 ways. I think the best one is simply to say "I love you!".
當你發覺環境是不可改變的時候﹐你便要改變自己的看法。可能你會覺得這是一種妥協﹐你是沒有了自由的選擇。從另外的一個角度看﹐你是選擇了平靜。

我們努力想得到的﹐便是我們心中的靜念。

Thursday, May 13, 2004

If you need to make decision in a day, you can consider to wear yellow.

Today I wear yellow, therefore I have enough power to make instant judgment.
I find that I very enjoy the process in root cause finding.

Actually it is a process of reasoning. In the process, we try to build up module, then try to prove it. After several self accept and reject processes, then the real root cause may be found.

Through the accept and reject processes, we finally can reach a stage that we accept what we have suggested or totally reject it.

What I like most in the process is that we can be brave to reject what we have said. It is not the type that we tend to forget what we have said but we can admit the wrong assumption.
真正的喜悅﹐一定是打從心底發出來的。

真正的關心﹐不一定只是對你的讚美﹔當有人記得你所做的事﹐便是一種很貼心的關心。

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

What's life? Please see the extract of this book.

I may have interest to know more about the meaning of life. While you do things that are following your heart, people see you as abnormal.

Question: Who has the right to make such judgment?
I think: The person should be myself.
How to be happy? It can be easy as well as difficult. Please read this to see whether you agree it or not.
Someone will say: To forget a person is difficult.

I will say: It is not easy to forget a person but when you aren't miss that person, then one day you sure can forget him/her, without your intentionally effort.
The most problematic case is not you don't know anything but only you know a part of the process and you think you know the whole.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

The worst in this world is without trust.

Monday, May 10, 2004

Want to write but don't have mood today!

Sunday, May 9, 2004

最近﹐找來一個樂趣﹐就是瀏覽網上書店。我們的時間有限﹐根本是看不到幾本書﹐所以看看網上書店中的簡介﹐也是蠻有趣的。有些時候﹐發表一下我自己對某本書的意見﹐也是蠻開心的。
成年人的為什麼

當你是成年人的時候﹐好像我們是不容許問太多的為什麼。問太多﹐你便變成一個無知的人。所以﹐成年人也偏向不問為什麼﹐因為他們害怕別人的眼光。

在不知道情況的情形下﹐人們便習慣猜想事情的始末。後果﹖大家都應該清楚。很多的誤會﹐便是從此產生的。

我真的不明白﹐問一個為什麼﹐真的是那麼難的嗎﹖現在的我﹐勇於表現自己是不明白的。我明白﹐有些時候﹐你是沒有答案的﹐所以你害怕我的不明白。可能我真的不懂人際間的交往﹐時常把別人弄在不知怎麼樣的境況中。

其實﹐你大可以告訴我﹐你是沒有答案的﹐我從來也沒有想過你是一本百科全書嗎﹗
是什麼﹐為什麼

在劉墉的“人就這麼一輩子”一書裡﹐有著以上的兩個詞語。看罷那篇文章﹐覺得很有意思。

他說﹕是什麼是一般的兒童所發問的問題﹐為什麼便是那些天才兒童喜歡問的問題。就是他們問的事情不一樣﹐所以他們的天資也不一樣。

在我認為﹐天才兒童不只是問為什麼﹐他們在聽了答案以後﹐他們是有能力去融會貫通﹐將別人的答案變為自己的知識。如果只是聽的話﹐沒有自己的思考﹐根本是沒有任何作用的。

能夠成為天才兒童﹐有的是他們的勇氣﹐因為他們不怕艱難﹐他們願意把自己可以遊玩的時間﹐用來思考。

對於那些只管問是什麼的人﹐他們是沒有能力去理解那股勇氣。他們可能會說﹕我沒有你們那麼愚蠢﹐當你們知道為什麼的時候﹐我來問你是什麼便成了。

你們知道嗎﹖知識是需要自己用時間和苦功去累積的。別人根本幫不上忙。

Saturday, May 8, 2004

我是一個典型的愛秩序的人。在“九型人格”一書裡﹐是這樣形容我的﹕
- 守規則是自然的事
- 會給身邊的人無形的壓力
- 是行動中心的類型
- 如果別人批評我﹐我會仔細的檢討自己
- 注重細節和效率
If you are a guy and want to know what a romantic gift is, please read here.
Here's a website that I highly recommend. The writer is called Andrew Matthews, who is one of my favorites.
This is a book that may make you think.
Try to surf this website. There contains books from Paul Wilson who tells you how to be calm.
我們眼中的世界

我們永遠是相信自己的﹐所以我們也希望﹐這個世界上的人的看法也和我們一樣。這絕對是可以理解的。

不管我們是理性的﹐還是不理性的﹐我們都認為我們的行為是合符世界的標準。我們是沒有足夠的能力﹐去認同別人的行為模式﹐因為認同別人便等於否定自己。

能夠真正的容納﹐也需要勇氣的。你們有這樣的氣度嗎﹖
理性 = 合情理

我說自己是一個合情理的人﹐英文的說法是reasonable。我的朋友說他不知道我是否一個合情理的人﹐他說我是一個理性分析的人。他告訴我﹐律師便是擅用理性分析的行業﹐他們永遠看來也是合情理的。

我知道﹐我是一個絕對理性的人。要我去做一件事情﹐我需要的是理由。正因為這些理性﹐我永遠也不會後悔。當然我也有意氣用事的時候﹐但是我絕對可以為自己所說的話負責﹐絕不會事後對人說﹐這是我的無心快語。

我不相信什麼無心快語﹐因為那些全是我們的潛意識。特別是那些無心快語﹐硬是我們的心底話。

Friday, May 7, 2004

在“從容工作小書”裡﹐看到一則很管用的話語﹐它是這樣說的﹕承認自己的無知﹐愈早承認自己沒有任何答案﹐就有更多的時間來找尋解決之道。

你們要知道﹐能夠承認自己的無知﹐是需要很大的勇氣的。如果你沒有這個勇氣﹐你們有沒有想過﹐誰人曾要求你要知道所有的事情﹖如果有的話﹐那個人一定是你自己。
Some interesting statistics from this website.

Thursday, May 6, 2004

如果你的寫字檯是在窗邊的話﹐而你是背著窗而坐的﹐在你用電腦的時候﹐你會感到熒光屏反光嗎﹖可能你是感覺到﹐又可能你是喜歡在自然的光度下工作。

當你表達了自己的意願﹐別人還在堅持己見的時候﹐你會有什麼的感覺﹖眼睛是我的﹐只有我知道我的感覺﹐為何有人會把自己眼睛的反應﹐硬加在我的眼睛上﹐還要求我去檢查眼睛﹖因為她說﹕我的眼睛可能壞了。
包裝

你們認為包裝是重要嗎﹖還記得第一次去日本旅遊﹐時常被那些可愛的包裝所吸引。上一次去日本﹐是兩三年前的事了﹐我再不覺得日本的包裝有什麼特別﹐因為在香港也可以找到很多很多。

第一次和人見面﹐會被他們的外表所吸引。慢慢的﹐如果你發覺那個人沒有什麼內涵﹐你對他的印象會否改變呢﹖

我比較相信內涵﹐因為這會伴隨你一生一世的。

Wednesday, May 5, 2004

這個課程﹐真的很昂貴。我推薦你看這本﹐相信從書裡﹐你也可以得到你想得到的東西。
請看看這篇文章﹐看你已經做了幾種。我肯定的﹐我正在做第19 點的事。
“該點一根煙,還是泡一杯咖啡?或者根本來點酒?在等待的時候省略號I do not know way. 等你的時候,想做的事都是我平常不做的。因為我知道平常搞不定我此刻的思念。”

以上的﹐我是從這個網頁裡抄錄下來的。你們看得懂作者想要說什麼嗎﹖我知道我是沒有資格去評論別人的作品﹐但是我認為﹐這個作者的文筆﹐真的有些問題。
找到了人生的新方向﹐因此我的心也能夠放開點。

在這個過程裡﹐我領略到我們絕對是需要適當的情緒釋放。如果你不能夠釋放你的情緒﹐哪怕受害的只有你自己。

本著自己的心﹐放鬆的去做你認為適當的事吧﹗

Tuesday, May 4, 2004

不需要你的回應

我覺得這句話﹐其實是很傷害的。

當你等待別人回應的時候﹐卻得不到﹐是會感到受傷的。相反的﹐如果你對那些應該給你回應的人說﹕我不需要你的回應﹔那些人﹐可能也會感到受了傷。

別人傷害了你﹐而你用另外的方法令那些傷害你的人﹐受了傷。 這個過程﹐可能真的會沒完沒了。表面上﹐看似得到了我想得到的東西。事實呢﹖我是不會感到開心的。

Monday, May 3, 2004

公司最近推出了一個在職培訓的計劃﹐某些員工會接受為期兩年的訓練。這個週期﹐剛剛是我自己為自己定下的週期。

我覺得如果要我有信心的去處理一些事情﹐我需要的時間是兩年。我的定義﹐是沒有任何東西去支持的﹐只是憑感覺。

有些人認為兩年的時間是太長了點﹐我卻認為剛剛好。我需要的不止是信心﹐還有真的是得心應手的那一種。自己認為有信心﹐可能只懂盲無目的去尋找自己的目標。結果﹖當然是一無所有。
今晚發現﹐我的爸爸也是一個很好的談話對象。對於我在工作上面對的心煩事﹐他都願意細心聆聽﹐也發表了他的意見。

他對我說﹕如果別人走進你所管理的範圍時﹐便要作出警告﹔另外的﹐可以置之不理。
給自己的話

昨晚﹐作了一個很長很長的夢。夢的內容﹐已經記不起﹐但是卻忘不了最後的一句話﹐就是叫自己不要鑽牛角尖。

我會把這句話記住﹐共勉之。

Sunday, May 2, 2004

守株待兔

相信你們一定知道這個典故﹐也明白當中要表達的意義。對於我來說﹐從來也不相信有守株待兔這回事。我相信的﹐只是我自己的努力。當然我們有的是幸運﹐當我沒有遇上幸運的時候﹐我也不會埋怨。

不知道﹐為何我會把守株待兔這個故事拿出來。我想表達的﹐只是我再不會忍受我覺得不可能再忍受的事情﹐我指的是在工作方面。

我知道﹐我指責他人的不準時把工作完成﹐絕對是正確的做法。
Today I find something that is interesting. Again it is come from a book calling What Women Want Men to Know.

Reacto Man has a rigid way of approaching challenges or problems, and thus always seems to be on the defensive, ready to protect himself from what he sees as danger. The problem is that there's no way a woman can talk to Reacto Man without being accused of looking like a basket case.

Even if we start out feeling clam and centered, after a few mintues of talking to Reacto Man, we're defending ourselves:

"Stop bringing up something that happened four years ago! You're not being fair!"

Talking to Reacto Man is a verbal trap from which you can't escape uninjured.


At least I now know why there is always no effective discussion with my boss, although the boss is a SHE.
上海雲吞麵

在一間自稱為雲南小鍋米線的小店裡﹐有一款麵食叫上海雲吞麵。當店員把一碗上海雲吞麵端到客人的面前的時候﹐那女孩卻大聲叫喊﹐為什麼不是上海麵。碗裡的是日本拉麵。

另外的一個顧客﹐他想要牛腩麵﹐店裡有的只是腩肉。他們在牛腩和腩肉的單向溝通後﹐那顧客離開了店﹐因為他堅持要吃牛腩麵。

在這間小店裡﹐還有台灣的飲品售賣。

一國兩制的香港﹐看似這店主真的支持啊﹗還不止﹐他還支持一個中國的概念﹐還有加入一些外國的元素。
排解心中的悶氣

最近找來一個蠻好的方法﹐就是去選擇今天我需要的顏色。每一種顏色都有它的能量(以前已經介紹過一個網站)﹐都有它的解釋。嘗試了幾天﹐覺得真的幫了我一把。

如果你有興趣的話﹐請也試試看。

Saturday, May 1, 2004

I found a good explanation about one of my colleagues' behavior. He is indeed a slippery man. What I mentioned below is come from a book calling What Women Want Men to Know.

Slippery man is a guy that avoids discussing things. So women will act liked this: We bug them to talk to us; we chase them around to try to get closure on decisions we need to make; we keep bringing up unfinished business over and over again until we sound like a broken record. The more we try to pin them down, guys, the more pressured they feel, and the more slippery they become!
不見了的妹妹回來了

我的妹妹已經有差不多兩年﹐沒有回來探望父母﹐我們說她失蹤了。今天她和她的兒子﹐在我父母家出現﹐我一看見她﹐便對她說﹕失蹤回來了。

當我和朋友說﹐我的妹妹沒有回家的時候﹐他們都問為何我們不找她﹐我也不知道怎樣去回答﹐就是我們家沒有去找她。她已經不是小孩﹐如果她不和我們聯絡﹐我們也拿她沒辦法。

她回來﹐還帶來一個男朋友﹐我相信她是幸福的。
男與女

在"What Women Want Men to Know" 一書裡﹐發現以下可以讓我們想想的內容﹕
女人說﹕Let's talk!
男人會認為﹕What's the problem?
相反﹐如果女人說﹕Let's make love!
男人會否說﹕Why, do you want to make a baby?

看罷以上的對話﹐真的有很深的啟發。我認為我們要想的﹐不只是男與女的事﹐而是人際關係的種種。
認識人性

昨天﹐我收到一位同事對我的評論。她說我太懂人性了。聽罷﹐很是驚奇。

對﹗我是看了很多關於人性的書﹐我也寫了很多關於人性的文章﹐但是從來我也不感覺到自己已經開始懂起人性來。

從小開始﹐我都喜歡觀察﹐想想某人的行動背後的動機。或者﹐我想擁有自己的人生哲學﹐所以我愛思想。在我認為﹐哲學不是單憑思想﹐而是那些可以應用的東西。光只說而不想它的效用﹐只是瞎說。
另一個角度

正在看“What Women Want Men to Know”﹐在看書的當兒﹐發現了自己的一個轉變。這本書﹐大概是在兩年前買的。看了不到百分之三十﹐已經被我鎖在抽屜裡面﹐因為我在看這本書的時候﹐覺得很迷惘。迷惘的原因是我在書裡面﹐找不到自己。可能在當時﹐我是借助書中的內容﹐去尋找自己﹐從而來肯定自己。

現在的我﹐是比較喜歡去認識自己﹐去認識那個我還未能知道的自己。我覺得我的心是較為寬容了點﹐我自己也準備好去接受一個我還不認識的自己。

正因為這樣﹐我用另一個角度去看這本書。我再不規範自己從男與女的角度去看﹐而是用“人“的角度去看﹐因為我們可以擁有女性的特質﹐也同時可以擁有男性的品質。就這麼樣﹐我開始喜歡這本書起來。
問題是可以管理的

問題在詞典裡的解釋是這樣的﹕要求回答或解釋的題目﹔須要研究討論並加以解決的矛盾、疑難﹔關鍵、重要之點﹔事故或麻煩。

我們很多的時候﹐都把我們的焦點放在麻煩的方向上﹐而我們卻忽略了問題便是關鍵所在﹐是可以解決的。

其實﹐問題是可以借助另外的問題去解決的。我所持的觀點便是要求自己去回答我自己認為矛盾和麻煩的事故﹐在思考的過程裡﹐自己對自己作出討論﹐慢慢的﹐便可以找來一個令問題變為不是問題的轉捩點。

看起來﹐好像是有一點虛幻﹐不知道從何入手。只有你肯相信﹐我肯定你是可以做到的。我呢﹖已經把我認為的問題化作一個可以推動我的能量了。